Learn Male Psychology Secrets from Brandon Martin, Author of "Relationship Goddess"

I get hundreds of emails a day from women asking me about male psychology in relationships and dating.

There’s no doubt about it…

 

 

The psychology of women when it comes to relationships and dating is complicated and confuses most women… from meeting, to starting a connection, falling in love, to staying in love.

As much as women know what they know about men, most women don’t understand male psychology when it comes to situations about love and dating… or why men do things like pull away or lose interest.

Many women want to know how to increase a man’s psychological attraction and love so she can enjoy the ecstasy of love.

But I’ve found that many women fail to reach this goal because they believe they already understand male psychology – especially when it comes to dating and love.

So today, I’m going to share with you two secrets about the psychology of men and falling in love. I will demystify men and make men EASY to interact with. But I ask that you keep an open mind as you read.

You will learn the basics of psychology – what drives men, how they start falling in love, how to make them stay, and how to control your interactions with a man.

If you’re like many of the thousands of women I’ve coached over the years, you want to know how to:

  • Spark more interest and attraction from men
  • Make a man fall in love or STAY in love
  • Stop men from being "hot and cold" and non-commital while dating
  • Inspire men to give more attention, affection

So, let’s jump right in.

Learn Secrets About

Inside you will learn....

  • Inside the male mind & sparking LOVE
  • 3 MISTAKES that make men pull away
  • Why men quit giving AFFECTION
  • How to get his mind OBSESSED with only you & stop his "wandering eye"
  • 2 qualities that tell men you're "the one"
  • 6 SECRETS that inspire men to open up

Enter your first name and a valid email to read Brandon's FREE "Male Psychology Secrets" eLetter & learn exclusive secrets about men, dating and relationships.

Your info will be kept 100% private | unsubscribe any time

Male Psychology Secret 1: The Psychology of Men Falling in Love

I’ve discovered that men fall in love with women for very different reasons than most women think.

The obvious truth is...

Men fall in love for different reasons than women fall in love.

The male psychology about love is different from female psychology. Most men split women into two categories in their mind.

1. Women who they would consider falling in love with

2. Every other woman

So, what causes men to want to date certain women and avoid others?

Here's what most guys want but will never tell you...

The biggest difference between female and male psychology when it comes to dating is that most women fall for a man’s masculine qualities, like confidence, strength or dependability.

But most men fall for a woman’s feminine qualities, like softness, open-heartedness and even dorkiness.

Most of today’s women have an overabundance of masculine qualities, like leadership, control and independence.

Women today are independent minded and spend a lot of time studying, working, and securing a future.

In the public eye, most will tell you that these are good qualities for a relationship and men “should” like them.

But the reality is, what most people SAY men should want, and what men respond to emotionally are two different things.

Psychology, emotions and millions of years of evolution don’t care about what society says “should” be right.

Here's the trick...

If you learn to increase what I call “Yin feminine” energy, you can become addictive to men on a psychological level.

The great news is, any woman can learn how to do this.

It doesn’t matter how men (or a specific man) have seen you in the past.

With your understanding of male psychology about dating, you can change how men perceive you today and make a man fall deeply in love with you – if you start making the right changes.

Male Psychology Secret 2: Why Men Stay in Love with Some Women & Not Others

I’m about to tell you a secret about male psychology in relationships and dating that flies in the face of what most women believe about men.

Most women don't understand a man's thought process when choosing to be in a relationship. Many women believe men choose women based on their looks, age or social status.

Many women believe men choose women based on their looks, age or  social status.

And there’s some truth in that..

Yeah, men can be dumb idiots sometimes.

But we often find that quality guys end up going for women without the best looks or status.

Why?

Here’s a hidden male psychology secret about love that you probably didn’t know about.

I’ve come to understand that men have a subconscious “screening process” for who they stay in love with and who they don’t.

 

I say “subconscious” because typically it’s below his awareness… In other words, it’s not something he thinks about… it’s something he just feels.

Many women fail this screening process because they don’t understand the psychology of men falling love. And this is a big reason why many of today’s men choose the single life over a relationship.

 

Men stay in love for THIS reason...

Most men are looking for a specific, ongoing emotional experience with a woman.

When a woman gives him this experience, he will cross oceans to be with her. It doesn’t matter if he’s busy, not “ready” for a relationship or has life drama.

When a woman fails to give him this specific emotional experience, that’s when you see men “check out”, pull away, or stop giving attention.

If you want to learn the secret of how to give a man this ongoing emotional experience, sign up for my free “Male Psychology Secrets” eLetter below.

Just enter your first name and a valid email, and you’ll get these in depths secret sent straight to your inbox.

You can unsubscribe at any time and you’ll never be obligated to purchase anything.

It just takes two seconds, so subscribe now!

It just takes two seconds.

Learn Secrets About

Inside you will learn....

  • Inside the male mind & sparking LOVE
  • 3 MISTAKES that make men pull away
  • Why men quit giving AFFECTION
  • How to get his mind OBSESSED with only you & stop his "wandering eye"
  • 2 qualities that tell men you're "the one"
  • 6 SECRETS that inspire men to open up

Enter your first name and a valid email to read Brandon's FREE "Male Psychology Secrets" eLetter & learn exclusive secrets about men, dating and relationships.

Your info will be kept 100% private | unsubscribe any time

A Man "Ghosted" You? Here's What To Do Next

When a man “ghosts” you after leading you to believe that he likes or even loves you, it’s an extremely confusing situation.

 

Sometimes men make it clear that he is very interested, and then poof… he’s gone.

He doesn’t reply to your messages, he doesn’t call, he doesn’t send anything at all.

 

The first thought that runs through many women’s head is, is he ok? Is his phone broken?

 

Did he DIE?

 

After these initial thoughts wear off and she gets a bit more clear headed (or sees his active status on social media), she may start wondering if there is another woman involved, or what possible reason he has to ghost her.

This is usually when the woman comes out of denial and anger sets in.


“How could he do this to me?” some women think. “How could he lead me on like this and then disappear?”

This is usually when the woman comes out of denial and anger sets in.

 

“How could he do this to me?” some women think. “How could he lead me on like this and then disappear?”

 

This is the hurt ego.

 

Most women in this situation can’t comprehend why a man would ghost out. It seems to make no sense at all, especially if he was showing a lot of interest or wanting to be together beforehand.

 

Well, after years of researching relationships between men and women and coaching thousands of women around the world, I’ve found that there are three foundational reasons we must consider why a man will “ghost” a woman.

Learn Exclusive Secrets About

Inside you are going to learn secrets about...

  • Inside the male mind - & how to get his LOVE
  • 3 MISTAKES that make men pull away
  • Why men quit giving AFFECTION
  • How to get his mind OBSESSED with only you & stop his "wandering eye"
  • 2 qualities that tell men you're "the one"
  • 6 SECRETS that inspire men to fully open up

Possibility 1: He's Ghosting You Because He Has Life Issues

He may have issues in his life blocking him from wanting to a relationship with you.

 

It could be family, work or life related… and it’s all about how HE is processing those events.

 

Not everyone is as mature as the Dalai Lama, and many men often handle relationships and life in immature or inefficient ways.

 

 

People are not perfect and often handle life in ineffective ways.

 

This is just something we must accept.

 

While you may feel that if you were in his life, you could make his life easier, he may not see it that way… and that’s just something we have to respect.

 

Why?

 

Because the harder you push a man to open up to you, the more likely he will dig his heals in and resist you.

 

Why?

 

Because men often need time and space to deal with issues. When they are forced to do something they’re not comfortable with (whatever the reason), it often makes men feel not understood and isolated. Not good if you want to get closer to him.

Possibility 2: You're Doing Something To Cause Him To Ghost You

The second more likely reason why a man will ghost a woman is because of MISTAKES IN HER APPROACH to him.

 

Yes, even though he might have said sweet nothing to you before he ghosted, the fact is that he DID ghost you after all…. as much as the that might sting to hear.

 

One of the BIGGEST reasons why men are affectionate and then ghost out is when a woman interacts in a way with a guy that makes him feel TRAPPED.

 

Yes.

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Even though he was showing interest, many women don’t know how their energy and words truly affect men.

Men are not very open (even with themselves) about their honest feelings.

 

While he might THINK that he wants you, he THINK things like you are attractive, you would make a good girlfriend, mother of his children etc. his HEART is not FEELING the correct feeling… namely the insatiable desire to be with you and only you.

 

This is a dangerous position for a man because this can spur a little something called “commitment phobia”.

It’s this insatiable, highly emotional desire to be with a woman that I focus on teaching women how to make men feel.

 

This combined with how many women inadvertently come off as overly needy, talk about the future, this will push a man away fast.

 

Different men handle it differently. Some men will tell you to your face, other men will ghost because they don’t want to or don’t know how to deal with the situation.

 

It’s not that he’s a bad guy, it’s just that he doesn’t know any better and perhaps no one ever taught him how to deal with a situation like this.

 

The third reason is he has another woman in the picture.

 

In this situation, the only thing you can do is look like the BEST option for him.

 

This means becoming the woman who effortlessly creates an emotional bond in any man she choses.

 

This is something that ANY woman can learn to do if she so chooses and has the motivation to do so.

 

Often, the most powerful motivation for becoming our most attractive self is experiencing a situation in which we feel paralyzed emotionally and rejected by the object of our affection, perhaps the feeling you currently have.

Possibility 3: Another Woman Is In The Picture

In this situation, what you must do is look like the BEST choice for him.

 

Most women in this situation make the same mistakes that all the other woman make, making them look like every other woman and not special.

 

This means engaging in behaviors that lower a man’s attraction rather than increasing his attraction.

 

 

This means becoming the woman who effortlessly creates an emotional bond in any man she choses.

 

 

This is something that ANY woman can learn to do if she so chooses and has the motivation to do so.

 

 

Often, the most powerful motivation for becoming our most attractive self is experiencing a situation in which we feel paralyzed emotionally and rejected by the object of our affection, perhaps the feeling you currently have.

What To Do Now

When a man ghosts you, the best thing you can possibly do is GIVE HIM AND THE SITUATION SPACE.

 

Most women who are ghosted, out of the fear of losing the guy, blow up a man’s phone asking him what he’s doing, where he is and what’s going on.

 

All this usually does is push the guy further away by demonstrating more of the behavior that were already pushing him away.

 

Many women either don’t get a response back or get a very excuse ridden, unsatisfying response that makes them feel even worse than before.

You need to start learning what men TRULY want from women… not just what society says men “should” want.

 

 

If you want to learn what men really want psychologically and emotionally to make them want a relationship, you got to sign up for my 100% free relationship advice eLetter for women.

 

 

In it, I will show you many shocking and interesting secret about men, male psychology and how to make a man fall hopelessly in love.

 

 

Just enter your name and a valid email in the purple box  below. It  only takes two seconds and you will be learning very important secrets that you need to know about men.

 

Learn Secrets About

Inside you are going to learn secrets about...

  • Inside the male mind - & how to get his LOVE
  • 3 MISTAKES that make men pull away
  • Why men quit giving AFFECTION
  • How to get his mind OBSESSED with only you & stop his "wandering eye"
  • 2 qualities that tell men you're "the one"
  • 6 SECRETS that inspire men to fully open up

Just enter your first name and email to get my FREE Male Psychology & Relationship Advice eLetter" and have these secrets and more sent straight to your inbox now.

Learn Male Psychology Secrets from Brandon Martin, Author of "Relationship Goddess"

I get hundreds of emails a day from women asking me about male psychology in relationships and dating.

There’s no doubt about it…

 

 

The psychology of women when it comes to relationships and dating is complicated and confuses most women… from meeting, to starting a connection, falling in love, to staying in love.

As much as women know what they know about men, most women don’t understand male psychology when it comes to situations about love and dating… or why men do things like pull away or lose interest.

Many women want to know how to increase a man’s psychological attraction and love so she can enjoy the ecstasy of love.

But I’ve found that many women fail to reach this goal because they believe they already understand male psychology – especially when it comes to dating and love.

So today, I’m going to share with you two secrets about the psychology of men and falling in love. I will demystify men and make men EASY to interact with. But I ask that you keep an open mind as you read.

You will learn the basics of psychology – what drives men, how they start falling in love, how to make them stay, and how to control your interactions with a man.

If you’re like many of the thousands of women I’ve coached over the years, you want to know how to:

  • Spark more interest and attraction from men
  • Make a man fall in love or STAY in love
  • Stop men from being "hot and cold" and non-commital while dating
  • Inspire men to give more attention, affection

So, let’s jump right in.

Learn Secrets About

Inside you will learn....

  • Inside the male mind & sparking LOVE
  • 3 MISTAKES that make men pull away
  • Why men quit giving AFFECTION
  • How to get his mind OBSESSED with only you & stop his "wandering eye"
  • 2 qualities that tell men you're "the one"
  • 6 SECRETS that inspire men to open up

Enter your first name and a valid email to read Brandon's FREE "Male Psychology Secrets" eLetter & learn exclusive secrets about men, dating and relationships.

Your info will be kept 100% private | unsubscribe any time

Male Psychology Secret 1: The Psychology of Men Falling in Love

I’ve discovered that men fall in love with women for very different reasons than most women think.

The obvious truth is...

Men fall in love for different reasons than women fall in love.

The male psychology about love is different from female psychology. Most men split women into two categories in their mind.

1. Women who they would consider falling in love with

2. Every other woman

So, what causes men to want to date certain women and avoid others?

Here's what most guys want but will never tell you...

The biggest difference between female and male psychology when it comes to dating is that most women fall for a man’s masculine qualities, like confidence, strength or dependability.

But most men fall for a woman’s feminine qualities, like softness, open-heartedness and even dorkiness.

Most of today’s women have an overabundance of masculine qualities, like leadership, control and independence.

Women today are independent minded and spend a lot of time studying, working, and securing a future.

In the public eye, most will tell you that these are good qualities for a relationship and men “should” like them.

But the reality is, what most people SAY men should want, and what men respond to emotionally are two different things.

Psychology, emotions and millions of years of evolution don’t care about what society says “should” be right.

Here's the trick...

If you learn to increase what I call “Yin feminine” energy, you can become addictive to men on a psychological level.

The great news is, any woman can learn how to do this.

It doesn’t matter how men (or a specific man) have seen you in the past.

With your understanding of male psychology about dating, you can change how men perceive you today and make a man fall deeply in love with you – if you start making the right changes.

Male Psychology Secret 2: Why Men Stay in Love with Some Women & Not Others

I’m about to tell you a secret about male psychology in relationships and dating that flies in the face of what most women believe about men.

Most women don't understand a man's thought process when choosing to be in a relationship. Many women believe men choose women based on their looks, age or social status.

Many women believe men choose women based on their looks, age or  social status.

And there’s some truth in that..

Yeah, men can be dumb idiots sometimes.

But we often find that quality guys end up going for women without the best looks or status.

Why?

Here’s a hidden male psychology secret about love that you probably didn’t know about.

I’ve come to understand that men have a subconscious “screening process” for who they stay in love with and who they don’t.

 

I say “subconscious” because typically it’s below his awareness… In other words, it’s not something he thinks about… it’s something he just feels.

Many women fail this screening process because they don’t understand the psychology of men falling love. And this is a big reason why many of today’s men choose the single life over a relationship.

 

Men stay in love for THIS reason...

Most men are looking for a specific, ongoing emotional experience with a woman.

When a woman gives him this experience, he will cross oceans to be with her. It doesn’t matter if he’s busy, not “ready” for a relationship or has life drama.

When a woman fails to give him this specific emotional experience, that’s when you see men “check out”, pull away, or stop giving attention.

If you want to learn the secret of how to give a man this ongoing emotional experience, sign up for my free “Male Psychology Secrets” eLetter below.

Just enter your first name and a valid email, and you’ll get these in depths secret sent straight to your inbox.

You can unsubscribe at any time and you’ll never be obligated to purchase anything.

It just takes two seconds, so subscribe now!

It just takes two seconds.

Learn Secrets About

Inside you will learn....

  • Inside the male mind & sparking LOVE
  • 3 MISTAKES that make men pull away
  • Why men quit giving AFFECTION
  • How to get his mind OBSESSED with only you & stop his "wandering eye"
  • 2 qualities that tell men you're "the one"
  • 6 SECRETS that inspire men to open up

Enter your first name and a valid email to read Brandon's FREE "Male Psychology Secrets" eLetter & learn exclusive secrets about men, dating and relationships.

Your info will be kept 100% private | unsubscribe any time

This is a picture of the machine that turns a man on vs. a woman.  I was forced into this by a female conspirator   🙂

man-woman-switches.jpg

(Picture courtesy of very frustrated man or woman).

By the way, if you’re humor bone has been broken, this a joke 🙂 .

Take care,

Brandon

Many women have to deal with aggressive guys who hit on them often and won't stop.

Sometimes you try to tell these guys your very best without hurting their feelings that you're not interested, they're not your type, but they STILL persist. They think they're being “persistent” and attractive but you know that they're never going to get anywhere.

And it's especially annoying when you are in a relationship already and you're content with your boyfriend.

Approaching and meeting new people/asking them out on a date shouldn't be anything to be embarrassed about and it should be as simple as walking a dog or riding a bike. It's just another thing.

But the problem is that it DOES get embarrassing. It's embarrassing when a guy comes up to you you're not interested in and you have to shut him down, and it's embarrassing when YOU go up to a guy who you want to go out with who shuts you down.

You feel guilty for standing up for yourself and telling him “No”.

Why? (more…)

***QUESTION***

Your article is very good. It raises a question in me though: You spoke of setting a man free. It is nesessary for free flowing of love. Where do sexual relationships come in? What if you live for today, a man is facinated with you, he sleeps with you and becomes distant…you dont want to posses him or ask to commit but you also don’t want to be used for sex, you want a relationship, how to make a man understand that you are not possesing him but you are interested in a relationship, but the man sees it as commitment request. Its not. Perhaps you could write about this subject. Its on my mind alot. Thank you

MY COMMENTS:

The first thing you need to know is you're not alone.

Many women have an agonizing fear about being used for sex.

Why?
(more…)

There is a long standing unspoken rule for women: “I must be pretty or I don't stand a chance being attractive to him.”

How much truth is there really in this statement? We all know that most men are become dumb as a stump in the presence of an attractive woman, but is this all they pay attention to?

Men understand that they want a beautiful woman. Men ARE attracted to physical beauty.

Yeah that is true, but there are also other things a woman posses that men don't necessarily understand “why” they want.  (more…)

Yes and no.

In the traditional sense, no.

A woman who does not meditate lets her emotions run her entire life. If she does not meditate, her life in in complete flux, 24/7, even while she is fast asleep!

She's angry, upset, excited, elated, paranoid, jealous, afraid and loving all before the hat even hits the floor. She is so emotional that she doesn't even have time to think about how emotional she is.

This is NOT what a man likes.
(more…)

(NOTE: This is part two of the in this series. Read the previous post here Getting a Guy to Commit.)

Here's a little story.

A feminine woman walks into a pet shop looking to buy a brand new puppy.

She takes a look around the litter and they're all cute, but she sees EXACTLY the one that she wants immediately.

She takes it home, names it “Fluffball” and falls in love with the puppy.

Now, a man walks in to the same puppy store and looks at the litter of puppies…but there's something different about the way he approaches the puppies, he's not really sure which one he wants.

In fact, he wants to take ALL of the puppies home with him and “try” them all out.

He's unsure about committing to one particular puppy so quickly.

Why is it so hard for a man just to want one woman, where as it's so easy for a woman to want just one man?

Here's a sobering fact: you will generally want love more than a man will if you don't know how to get him to “learn” to love you.

And men generally want to have more sexual partners than women.

The reason for this?

A sexual OBSESSION.

It's a well known fact that men think about sex all the time.

It has become an obsession.

Why?

Because sex is not something they shouldn't think about. It's something that's suppose to happen naturally, WITHOUT any thinking involved.

In the animal kingdom, animals mate and there is no thinking, there is only “doing” (each other).

In the human world, we have religion, society, parents and TV all condemning sex.

The absolutely natural, spontaneous event of sex has become an obsession because it has been REJECTED.

Surprisingly the world has looked down upon men enjoying sex.

You and I know that sexual energy is a very powerful energy and if it's pushed down, it has to go SOMEWHERE.

So that energy goes from the crotch to the CRANIUM.

When we reject sex as natural, we begin to think about it all the time rather than experiencing it naturally.

Sex is EVERYWHERE: advertisements, TV, Britney Spears etc. and it has such a profound effect on people because it is a condemned “taboo”.

Thing is, there is a lot guilt around sex.

It's almost unbelievable.

The point is, men are especially swamped in sexual obsession.

Why?

In general, it's more difficult for a man to get sexual partners than a woman.

Psychologists say that men throughout their lifetime will have 7 sexual partners on average and women 14.

No matter how you spin in, a girl simply has to be skinny and normal looking and she could walk down the street, ask any random guy to spend the night and nine times out of ten he will say “yes please!”

A man can't do this!

If a man were to walk down the street asking girls to spend the night, nine times out of ten he would be slapped!

We both know that women make it “difficult” for a man to get sex.

Most women have been taught all of their lives to do this from when they a little girl.

You don't know what he'll do once you say “yes”.

Once you say “yes”, you have given away all of your chips…HOPING that he will make a commitment afterwards.

And when a man doesn't need it so badly, it makes a woman crazy.

And you think by “holding out” from him it will make him want you even more too…but it never works out in the long run.

Sure it gets a man immediately interested, but as you something is missing.

It does something interesting to a man's psychology.

He becomes obsessed with “conquests”…and the problem is many women encourage it!

Women become teases.

I don't say that you are a tease, but many women are.

A woman will dress and act sexually without any intention of actually following through on it just to get a man to want her.

This drives men even deeper into their madness of their sexual obsession…which causes them to get the “wandering eye” later in a relationship.

Then when you finally DO have sex with a man, he is quick to leave…

Why?

Because he has “conquered” you.

You must approach this situation in an entirely NEW way if you would like men to stop using you for sex.

For a man to commit, you must learn how to calm his feverish obsession.

You ALLOW him to fall in love with you by becoming the woman he WANTS and WILL WANT for a long time.

A good start is by learning the 12 things that make a woman irresistible.

By the way, I'd love to hear your comments or questions, so if you have any, leave them below (make sure you read our Comments Policy beforehand).

I'll talk to you again soon.

With honor,

Brandon

Have you ever been with a man who you really enjoyed and who enjoyed you, but when the time came to take things to the “next level”, you were willing move up, but he wasn’t?

Maybe he even gave you nice excuses like “I’m not ready for a committed relationship.”

Or…

“I need my freedom.”

But somehow, you knew that there was something else going on?

Why is getting a guy to COMMIT to one woman an insurmountable task?

Why are so many guys commitment phobes?

I’m about to expose to you IN DETAIL everything you’ve ever wanted to know about getting a man to commit…sound good?

Honestly, this is not a subject that needs addressing.

This is an insignificant challenge if you follow me on all of the other things I go on blathering about.

But, there’s too much pandemonium around this topic, so much that I absolutely must give you the straight facts on this situation.

First…

The Key Difference Between Men And Women…

  • Women Worry About The Long-Term
  • Men Worry About The Short-Term
Many women I teach are very comfortable with the “now” moment. They love living in the present, with all of the emotions, excitement, rush and sometimes drama that happens.

Exclusive Male Psychology​

  • Inside the male mind - & how to get his LOVE
  • 3 MISTAKES that make men pull away
  • Why men quit giving AFFECTION
  • How to get his mind OBSESSED with only you & stop his "wandering eye"
  • 2 qualities that tell men you're "the one"
  • 6 SECRETS that inspire men to fully open up

Read my FREE "Male Psychology Secrets" eLetter & learn exclusive secrets about men, dating and relationships.

Your info will be kept 100% private & you can unsubscribe at any time.

But women worry about their future.

Here’s a fact.

The most future oriented woman doesn’t come close to the least future oriented man. Most women worry about their future, much more than men.

But men are the opposite.

Men are more comfortable with their future plans and ambitions and worry more about right now. The most “present” man is nowhere close to the least present focused woman. Men actually have a much harder time playing and enjoying, much more than women.

Women are natural partiers…men are natural planners. That’s what we feel most comfortable with.

Let me explain.

When a woman hears about a social event that she must go to, she doesn’t think twice about preparing herself, getting dressed and made up to go.

When a man hears about the same things, he stumbles around and “weighs his options”.

A girl feels more uncomfortable with their future while guys end up more uncomfortable with the celebration of right now.

Women celebrate constantly. Compared to guys, girls celebrate ALL OF THE TIME. Make no mistake.

It may not seem like it, but a man’s world is entirely different.

A woman can look at her entire life as a celebration, she can look at everything with “serendipity”. Everything is occurring as a long celebration.

Men only celebrate when invited to celebrate. And even then, many men find it hard to open up to it. They only manage to get a few minutes of celebration in before they feel uncomfortable. Even while celebrating he is somehow looking for a goal!

This is among the reasons why men like women and women like men. Men bring women a future and women bring men celebration.

Point to be learned?

Women Worry About The Long-Term While Men Worry About The Short-Term

Girls have the impending fear of growing older. It seems to always be lurking there in the back of her mind.

Because of the fear, she makes the most of right NOW. She’s young, vibrant and wants to celebrate it. The future, to her is some far off thing. And she is respected the most by society when she is YOUNG.

Feminine youth is celebrated to an incredible extent.

Men are not at all respected when they are young. Men are seen as sex addicted punks. Men only become respected when they mature and age and BECOME respectable.

Men ripen with age. Women decay with age.

By the time a woman hits a certain age, she is thrown out, rejected by society. She is no longer valued.

If you’ve ever wondered where the feverish restlessness comes from for needing so badly to get married and needing to secure her future before it falls out from under her, this is where it comes from.

Even from the beginning, girls are already thinking about marriage at the age of five!

They have their barbies and fantasize about marrying prince charming…which doesn’t happen as easily as she hoped for.

This is the whole “polarity” of men and women. A woman wants a man to be able to secure her future a man wants a woman to help him enjoy his life right now.

Women enjoy love, men enjoy freedom.

So the question is, how do you get a guy to want love?

This all leads to a fear of commitment in the long term for a man.

His “youthfulness” is rejected and he begins to obsess about, in the same way a woman’s “oldness” is rejected and she obsesses about it.

Make sense?

To handle ANY kind of commitment objections, take your relationships and dating experiences with him as a TODAY EVENT ONLY. You simply tell him “Our relationship/dating/whatever is a today event only, and if we should be together again tomorrow, then that is how it will be. But as long as we are together right now, I want to be with you completely.”

It’s not hard to do this!

A man wants freedom, so you simply give him what he thinks he wants! We love the people we love because they give us what we need, so give him what he needs.

The words aren’t as important as the energy behind the words. If you can be calm and playful with this, he’ll think you are the coolest woman alive.

You must let go of the fear of losing him. This is a basic pillar of relationships that needs to be taken care of immediately. In my world, it goes without saying!

Let me say it again.

*You must let go of the fear of losing him*

The fear of losing him only pushes him away, so drop the idea.

The thought of saying something like the above quote automatically strikes fear into the heart of many women I teach.

Why?

Because they’re “needy” for the man. They want to possess him and make sure he will never leave her.

I’m all for making miracles happen, I’ve seen MANY CRAZY things happen in relationships that are almost unbelievable, but this is not something that can make a miracle happen.

90% of women fear their man leaving them…and you know what?

90% of these women are left by the man…and they start wondering “What did I do wrong?”

The fear actually makes him pull away.

Most relationships today are VERY possessive.

Here, I teach you to allow him to be free.

Remember, he has come to you out of his own freewill because he felt GOOD around you and wanted to stick around you to continue the good feelings. If he wishes to stay, he should do so out of that same freedom.

Here’s the twist.

Allowing his freedom causes him to STAY.

Would YOU want someone around who wants to possess you?

Probably in most circumstances you’ve been in with men who became needy, you began to need more and more “space”. It might have even repulsed you.

It’s the same thing for a guy too.

And when you begin to look at relationships in this way, the relationship itself is able to BREATH. It gets a shot of adrenaline and is resuscitated.

Just like having all of the windows in your house open and allowing a fresh breeze to come in.

But you enjoy that breeze so much that you shut all of the windows to close it in. But soon, very soon, that air turns sour.

But, you didn’t realize your joy of it came from it’s freedom!

The freedom of that breeze to pass in and out of your house is what made it so cool, gentle, relaxing as it moved freely across your face.

Once you tried to possess it by closing all of the windows, it turned warm, stale and smelly.

See what I mean?

We can always plan for tomorrow, but we really never know what it will bring until it’s here. People get into marriage prepared to commit their entire lives together, and do you know what happens? More than 50% fail and the other 50% are miserable. They are absolutely miserable, don’t fool yourself into believing otherwise.

There are only a few exceptions, and they are the ones who get and follow what I’m saying here.

Most marriages are unhappy, angry, fight, bicker, cheat, lie all the way until death do they part.

But, love thrives on this moment only!

You can’t say for certain that you will love someone in 40 years time

All you know is that right NOW you feel like you can spend the rest of your life with this person. Right NOW. And let that be as beautiful as it wants to be.

There’s something else that needs to be said.

This thing psychologists go on about waiting two years before you getting hitched because that’s when the hormones die  and you can think more clearly about your decision is a CROCK. Whether its two hours, a day or five years, the future is STILL uncertain.

I’ve had many couple come to me after being together for a day who have the same problems as a couple that has been together 16 years.

Some are together for a week, get married and live happily ever after. Some are together 14 years, get married and regret it the 15th year.

From the many women I’ve coached in relationships, the happiest, most successful couples have dropped the idea that they will be with someone forever.

They come to me with an illusion of how they want things to be like that even THEY know is hollow.

That’s when it becomes a possibility. But it is not a possibility as long as you hold onto the belief. You give your relationship it’s best source of nourishment, freedom and love only when you become free yourself.

True love eludes most women because the second it comes into their life, they try too hard to keep it from leaving, but the very effort kills the love. Love is very fragile, and just like the guy himself, love must be given its freedom.

The same possessiveness that destroys the feeling of love is the same feeling of possessiveness that drives men away.

The “Paradox” Of Relationships With Men

But, this fear of insecurity causes many problems. Love is insecure. Love comes and goes as it pleases, and we try to hold onto it for as long as possible, until our tight grip squeezes it slowly to death.

Love, relationships, dating is a very gentle thing. It’s just like a flower. Even the slightest bit too much pressure on a flower can crush it and make the beautiful petals start to fall off until it looks more like a weed. A marriage puts massive amounts of pressure on both lovers to hold up to impossibilities that can’t be attained by the heart, by love.

Marriage wants commitment, but love is a free thing. marriage is cold, but love is warm. Marriage becomes boring, but love is always entertaining.

One with too much commitment of the unknown future will cause not death to the relationship, but death to the happiness of the individuals that make up the relationship.

Do you want a relationship to avoid loneliness to actually be happy and in love?

Somedays you will be unloyal to your lover and will want to do things a different way than he does. Some days you will not love. Some days you will love. There is no telling, but marriage does not account for that.

If you want a man to marry you and commit to the long term, you simply give him the option of making that choice. You want the man to commit, it has to be his choice to do so.

There is a need for room to breath, gentleness and no possessiveness. This is a very subtle mechanism that MUST be understood.

And the absolute irony is when we begin to look at it this way, the relationship THRIVES. And when the relationship thrives, it goes down the most ideal direction: a relationship filled to the brim with love and happiness. What more could you want?

When the pressure is taken off, all of a sudden, instead of feeling backed into a corner, he suddenly feels a freedom to choose. The pressure on both of your shoulders is suddenly lifted. And if the love is there, the choice will be absolutely clearly for love.

But you are afraid of giving him his freedom and finding out that the love is not there. The fact is, if you follow what I tell you – non-possessiveness, freedom, love, vibrancy, relaxation etc. etc. – you will automatically know why he is with you, out of love.

And these are not things that can be faked, games that can be played. No. They must come straight out of your authenticity. Only then will you know he is there for love out of YOU, not the game playing mask you put on. You mustn’t be afraid to shine your cryptic Dracula-like innards out into the light.

The relationship is allowed to breath and grow. We begin to accept this lover for exactly who they are, and it becomes a sheer delight.

Worry disappears. It just disappears like morning overcast in the sun.

But, the second you trick yourself into possessing him, you’re heart becomes broken. He cannot be possessed, and you know it. He is just as free as you are.

To get a guy to commit to you, you simply stop asking commitment of him!

Very risky indeed… but there are two possibilities:

  • Allow him and yourself to be free
  • Possess him and strike the fear of commitment into him

Men adore a laid back woman who doesn’t ask the impossible of him, who doesn’t pressure him. Drop female competition. Some is cute, too much is a nightmare for a guy.

Men love a woman who is relaxed and vibrant, not restless.

And then when you get rid of the possessiveness, and it’s as simple as unplugging a power cord, and become relaxed about your future and confidently believe and expect things to workout for you in it’s due time, all of the crisis falls away.

You can be in a committed relationship, but remember that each and every day it is a relationship, not by the years down into the untold future.

Whether you believe it or not, this is the reality.

When you live out of line with that truth, that’s when all of the pressure begins to build and the commitment problems arise like a typhoon.

When you live in line with this truth, all of the anxiety in the relationship turns into gratitude for having such a wonderful lover in your life today.

With honor,

Brandon

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